The Rumley Family

Loving Jesus, Loving Life

Eleven.

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It didn’t start out easy. It’s still not easy all the time.

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In the beginning, we were young. I was selfish and immature. SO selfish. Our arguments were emotional, at least on my end. And when he didn’t react with emotion (Mr. Steady over there), it made me even more mad. There were tears.

When we found out we were pregnant the first time, 2 months after the wedding, we were terrified. And thrilled. A tiny miracle, so quickly after we said our vows.

“Grace Elizabeth” means “undeserved gift from God.” And while that is certainly true of any sweet baby, I realize that God gave us a sweet gift that November a decade ago when he gifted us – practically kids ourselves – with our 9lb 12oz baby girl.

I was newly 22, not even married 11 months. And I was now a mama.

It was NOT the plan.

We were to get married; I was going to finish college. I was going to teach for a couple of years. AND THEN we were going to start our family, and I would be a stay-at-home mom.

Instead, God knew that if I continued in my immature, selfish ways, I would most likely destroy myself and our marriage. Having a baby and learning how to parent with Luke was one huge factor in teaching me the meaning of selflessness and sacrifice. It grew me up.

What a gift from the all-knowing God, rescuing me from my sin!

It is not always easy, this marriage thing.

When we argued, we had to swallow our pride and face each other. We didn’t (and still don’t) go to sleep with unresolved issues in our relationship. We forced ourselves to have physical contact when we were arguing, even when the last thing I wanted to do was have contact with that man. There’s just something about touch that dissolves anger.

We prayed together. Every day.

We committed to read God’s Word regularly.

We had to slowly, patiently learn a rhythm of life together.

We both had to grow in maturity and (more importantly) Christlikeness.

It takes work.

I had to learn to be a submissive wife, as God’s Word calls me to be. I had to learn to hold my tongue sometimes, and use it to encourage and build up my husband more. I realized that my job is to help Luke to become the man that God means for him to be, and I’ve had to grow into that role.

A good, strong marriage takes work.

And it’s undeniably worth it.

Because here we are, 11 years later, and I feel like we just haven’t had enough time together. Like we’re just beginning this crazy life together.

Sure, there are days that I want to smack him. (That’s my sin nature, of course.)

But over all, it just keeps getting better and better with time.

Because we work at it. Because we’re committed. Because we know that it is ultimately worth it.

Those vows we took on December 20, 2003? They hang above our bed, giving us a reminder of what we promised each other, and even more importantly, what we promised God.

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I’m praising that awesome God today for His goodness in giving me the gift of marriage – a sanctifying, electrifying, life-changing blessing.

I’m praising God today for giving me Luke – a man after His own heart, hardworking, intelligent, hilarious, sweet, and who loves God, the church, and his family well. I am a blessed woman.

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This marriage thing is so worth it.

2 Comments

  1. Lindsay Hoeflinger

    December 20, 2014 at 11:46 am

    Happy Anniversary!!!!!!! We love you guys! 
    So much of your words resonate with me Lacey- the emotional fights made worse by men not showing their feelings like we do, the being forced to grow up because of having a baby, wanting to smack your husband sometimes (kind of frequently), and more. But I think you’ve done a way more graceful job than I have- and I think you’re an amazing wife and mother, and I want to be like you when I grow up. 🙂 from what I’ve witnessed, you’re an awesome example of what a woman should be (even constantly working on that is the best example) for your girls and what to look for in a woman for your boys. Your family is an inspiration to me- and we love you guys! (Again.) 

  2. Happy Anniversary to a great couple. Knowing you both from different venues, it was wonderful to watch how God put you together and made His Love to grow within you. It’s very powerful to see a marriage work! Keep the good things going so you can be a mighty example to those who have yet to walk this path.  God bless you both!

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